SO NEAR... SO FAR

SO NEAR

The first two weeks without Lucy was so fucking annoying

The man lost his composure and was forced to let the boy in

and the boy turned every moment into a potential collision

because all he saw was Lucy through his new affliction

Tunnel Vision

and he spat the flipping dummy distinguishing boy from man

He didn't have a clue since he never had a plan

The fire that he held in his heart for her got hotter and brighter

and he exemplified the transition from the lover to the fighter  

I suppose peace is for someone else

It doesn't seem to occur

and neither does back to life as I knew it without her her

You see

all was well for a fella who fell no further than small walls

with clear peripherals

but the area of obsession is so thick

that you couldn't tap your way through the haze

with the blind stick, a sat nav

or all the wit I think I have

I've tripped into the petrol unpredictability

Kicking off at the wind just dissipates my voice

and rage makes the blindness worse

You know how much I can curse

but I'm cursed that I can't see

Lucy in this haze with me

 

I'm clamouring

abandoned at random by Luce, pet name Doris

Stumbling over earth without moisture

and hiccups with incompatible shapes

crawling through the minefield of exit routes

up and up toward the peak of ‘getting over you’

 

But for all the falls and shortness of breath

I never grazed my knees when I gasped for air

and howled to the black ether

to offer me a tangible noun to stabilise myself on crude foundation

where there’s no grip because the world spins spitefully anticlockwise

 

Even though I was scrambling in the picture anguish

I was as assured as a maypole because

these pollen fairies that cling to my hair in rodeo seasons

and those snowflakes that popped in micro-bubbles in my ear

soothing my nerves where sparks would fizzle under the soft water debris

were her essence in my air

She's never been more than a sixth sense away from me all along


5
SO FAR

So when I met this girl the other night                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      who was quite cutie                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

and she did amuse me

I wondered why she chose to choose me

when I'm off in a world of my own looking for Lucy

Maybe there's a void in her life and she wanted to use me

cause she behaved as though I could be the answer to her dreams

albeit loosely

 

Truth be

that though she's as pretty as a pic she didn't move me

However groovy she might be, and she is pretty groovy

she isn't... (you know)

well

She isn’t Lucy